Category Archives: depression


Initially, I had planned to write this as a correspondence on my wall on Facebook because the subject was a little too personal and I didn’t want it attributed to the brand I’m trying to create. But then I said to myself, “F*ck it! I’m all in!” As you well know, if you’re a follower of me and many of the endeavors I’ve established (Internet radio show, blog & Fan Page, social media, etc.) I’m real big on narcissism. And not that I’m questioning your intelligence but, here’s a definition of the word; because let’s be real, many of you have no idea of what it means. Narcissism is the pursuit of gratification from vanity or egotistic admiration of one’s own attributes. Now some of you are shaking your head and saying to yourself, “Brandt…! You some bullsh*t! How da f*ck you gonna say something like that & you be posting on this muthaf*cka (social media) 100 times a day?” I know, I know! I hate the sh*t myself! It’s a necessary evil. You see, I “thought” I had established a good enough reputation with my actions, deeds, kindness and work, that I could I just “announce” I was doing something that would be beneficial to the community and enlighten the masses that people would immediately flock to it based on premise that I had a “clean face.” See, contrary to popular belief, I hate attention. I like to lurk in the shadow and remain in mystery. Sure I like to be lauded for my accomplishments, but for the most part, I’m cool with not being the center of attention. That’s not a lack of confidence, just the applause of the crowd doesn’t appeal to me because I know it can be stripped and turned into “boos” at any moment. And boy was I wrong! You have to beg for attention to captivate the public’s imagination. Thus, it requires me to be active on social media to attempt to amass an audience. The irony is, when I first established my venture, I asked a collection of “friends” should I even return to social media (because I had left) to promote and establish my brand. And from the collective it was a resounding “Yes!” It’s funny how those same individuals don’t follow the pages, approve of the information or show support to the endeavors. (Sigh) It is what it is.

The question must be asked, without social media, what would people do to garner attention? In a world where hiding behind a keyboard, your profile avatar and “check-in” location allow you to create the persona you want the world to envision, how would people receive the gratification they so desire? What I’ve learned in recent weeks is that everyone isn’t a narcissist. They say the eyes are the window to the soul; and behind the red tinted eyes of individuals in both selfies and usies are people screaming out for help. They don’t want the attention that comes with luxury and beauty. They yearn for the comfort of a warm touch; they desire an attentive ear to listen to their problems and dreams; they crave the love that’s been lost with the absence of a cherished individual or failed relationship. So to compensate, they hide behind the burst of the flash bulbs, drown their sorrows with bottles laced with sparklers paraded throughout dimly lit venues, resort to retail therapy or immerse themselves in their work to avoid the issues that plague them. I’ve met people for which, despite their beauty, job status and intellect, feel empty because they’re attempting to fill an unknown void in their lives; their self esteem plummets because of the slightest adversity. I pity them. Many of them can’t handle the pressures life has to offer and they either decide to create a persona to compensate, wallow in their misery and plunge into depression or commit suicide. That’s not to say that everyone who has over 1,000 photos of themselves falls into this category, because the large majority of the public exudes confidence. It’s the individuals that you’re unaware of that should a concern; those that portray an image that everything’s fine that you should be leery of. It breaks my heart that I know people that are unhappy with themselves despite everything they have to offer and all of their achievements. So this blog is for them. From this day forward, I won’t make disparaging remarks about those who wish to inundate the worldwide web with images of themselves. (Cross my heart) However, for those to which this applies, stop hiding behind the lens of the camera, refocus, and ask for the help you seek. They say a picture’s worth a thousand words; it’s worth even less when you don’t know and understand your value. “We Are The Change!” I’m gone! (b)

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